Throughout your life, you may stumble upon different types of people. While some are meant to bring you happiness and joy, others are there to teach you a lesson. So, how to deal with manipulators biblically?
Many believers in the Christian religion are often placed in situations where they don’t know what’s the most appropriate way to act when someone wrongs them.
That’s why this article will elaborate on dealing with manipulators biblically to ensure you don’t wrong the Lord instead.
How to Deal With Manipulators Biblically
Dealing with a manipulative person has never been easy. Not only can they make you doubt yourself and your faith, but they may also distance you from all the people around you.
Many Christian believers are unsure how to deal with manipulators and stay faithful to the Lord. Acting out and letting anger control you may only lead you to sin and disobey God’s word.
That being said, here are some of the ways you can biblically deal with manipulators:
- Having faith in God
- Approaching the person with compassion
- Setting healthy boundaries
- Ending the relationship
Having faith in God
The most important thing you can do if you find yourself in a situation where you’re dealing with a manipulator is to have faith in the Lord.
Even though it may seem unreasonable to you now, the Almighty always has a plan for us. Maybe this person has been sent into your life to teach you a valuable lesson or test your faith.
Regardless of the reasons, you should always stay true to your beliefs and devote your time to prayers to ask the Lord for guidance.
Approaching the person with compassion
The second thing you can do is view the manipulator from a place of compassion and humility. Remember that even this person is a creation of God even though he has fallen off the righteous path.
That’s why you should keep them in your prayers and ask the Lord to help them see their wrongdoings.
Setting healthy boundaries
The next thing you should do as soon as you realize you’re being manipulated is to set healthy boundaries. Learn how to say “no” without fearing that the person will get angry with you.
The only one you should honor and obey is the Lord himself. If you mindlessly follow this person, they may influence you to succumb to sin without you even noticing.
Even though it’s hard to always stay mindful, remember that dealing with manipulators may put your relationship with God at risk. So, stand firmly behind your beliefs and ask the Lord for his protection. Only he can save you from the evil the manipulator spreads.
Ending the relationship
In a last-case scenario, where you see if there’s no other choice left, the only thing you can do is end the relationship with the manipulator. Whether it’s a lover, a friend, or a coworker, it’s best to stop talking to the person if you feel as if you’re getting nowhere with them.
In some situations, it’s best to respect your well-being and distance yourself from the one causing you harm. It’s not a sin if you calmly back away from the person in question.
However, be careful about how you do so as not to irritate the manipulator further. Instead of getting into an argument and risking sinning yourself, say a few prayers within yourself, and God will help you keep your peace.
Bible Verses Referencing How to Deal With Manipulators
If you’ve been feeling down after coming in contact with a manipulator and are unsure if the way you’ve acted is right, there are several Bible verses you may want to look up.
To better understand how God’s intended for us to act in these situations, it’s best to turn to the Holy Book itself.
Bible verses that reference faith in God
The first verse you may be interested in can be found in Proverbs 29:25. In these lines, the Bible reminds you that you should not fear any man who tries to bring you harm. The only one you should fear and respect is the Lord himself. Only by having faith can you be protected from earthly harm and malice. This advice can be once again found in Proverbs 19:21-25.
Another symbolic meaning of having faith in God even in the hardest situations can be seen in Ephesians 4:15. These verses teach you that you have to keep a cool head when met with hardships and believe that the Lord will give you his protection. Instead of arguing, try to achieve Jesus’ gracefulness and trust in your beliefs.
Lastly, one of the most reassuring words can be found in Romans 8:28. They teach you that everything will turn out okay by having faith in the Lord’s love and plan. You must remember that these situations may be tests to prove your devotion to him.
Bible verses that reference compassion
When it comes to approaching the manipulator with compassion, this message is seen in Luke 17:3. It reminds you that you have to stay mindful when dealing with such people. Even though they’re sinning, it’s not your place to judge them. Instead, you should keep them in your prayers and forgive them for the harm they’ve done you without seeking vengeance.
Another instance where the Bible tells you to be compassionate to those who wrong you can be found in Galatians 6:1. In these verses, it’s said that if you catch someone in sin, you should try to restore them on the right path. You’re all God’s creation and deserve a chance to redeem yourself. However, this verse also warns you of the temptation you may experience when dealing with such situations.
The same is later spoken in the verses of James 5:19-20, where saving someone from their sinful ways is also seen as a blessing for our souls. So, instead of judging them and acting in anger, try to open their eyes to their mistakes.
The Spiritual Meaning and Symbolism When Dealing With Manipulators
Now that you’re well-informed on how to deal with manipulators biblically, you may also want to discover the spiritual way.
Regardless of the religion or belief, anyone who has dealt with such people remembers how awful they might have made them feel. No one should put up with being constantly gaslighted or in fear.
Thus, there are several ways you can deal with manipulators spiritually, which are similar to the ones we saw in the Bible.
Here are some efficient ways you can deal with manipulative people without causing them harm:
- Identification and confrontation
- Learning how to communicate with them
- Setting boundaries
- Practicing self-care
Identification and confrontation
The first step in spiritually dealing with manipulators is recognizing the signs and confronting them. For someone to be able to manipulate you, they must first gain your trust. What starts with giving you compliments and reassurance can quickly turn to guilt-tripping and violence.
To properly detect if someone is trying to manipulate you, remember that these people often have the power to turn your weaknesses against you. Once they see that their tactics are working on you, they’ll start making you give up something from yourself to meet their self-centered needs. If you fall into their games, they’ll repeat the process anytime they need something from you.
Hence, the only way you can make them stop exploiting you is by confronting them about their actions. Tell them how you feel about how they’ve been mistreating you. Do this when you notice them trying the same tactic against you again.
If this effort results in guilt-tripping, the best thing you can do is ignore them. Instead of feeling sorry about how they feel, remember that you’re also a human being. Let them know that what they say hurts you and makes you feel like they don’t value you.
Learning how to communicate with them
The next step is to learn how to communicate with a manipulator properly. The key solution in any socialization with such a person is to remain calm. Remember that their manipulative tactics won’t work if you seem unbothered by their opinions. If you start getting angry and lashing out, they can only use it against you.
Furthermore, getting angry will cloud your judgment. You’ll let your emotions take over instead of remaining rational. This will make you even more vulnerable and susceptible to the manipulator’s tricks.
Once you’ve mastered staying calm, you should also focus on learning how to say “no”. No one should influence you to do something you don’t want. Avoid using “maybe” because it can easily be interpreted as a yes.
So, whenever something you don’t like is asked of you, firmly say “no” and don’t give in to the pressure. You must be assertive and allow yourself the space to be heard. In no case should you let the manipulator interrupt you and stop you from expressing your feelings.
Setting boundaries is the third crucial step for dealing with manipulators. The best way to do so is to be firm and assertive. Don’t let the person walk over you and overstep your limits. A manipulative person is likely to try and push your boundaries to get what they want. So, it’s important to stay true to your boundaries and not let them control you.
If you notice that the person continues overstepping your limits, you can always minimize your interaction with them. Remember that no one can make you talk to someone by force. If you’re feeling as if you’re getting nowhere with the manipulator, limit the time you spend with them and keep the conversations brief.
In a last-case scenario, you can always cut all ties off with the person. Don’t let them cause you more harm if nothing else works with them. Simply distance yourself and focus on your needs and desires.
The last thing you can do when dealing with manipulators is to practice self-care. Even though you may think that you’ve got it in the bag, dealing with such people can be emotionally and spiritually exhausting. Thus, you should always have a way to relieve the stress after such confrontations.
Take the time to focus on yourself and replenish the energy you’ve just lost. Try indulging in some fun and relaxing activities that fulfill you. For example, you can grab coffee with a friend and tell them about your experience. Or, if you don’t feel like talking about it, you can try meditating, running, or simply strolling around in nature.
Frequently Asked Questions
What do manipulators fear the most?
When dealing with a manipulator, you may think they have no weaknesses. But always remember that they’re only human. Most manipulators fear showing their true selves because they fear vulnerability.
How do you defend yourself against a manipulator?
While manipulators can make you feel small and insignificant, you should never let them distort your self-image. If you think someone is trying to manipulate you, you should always stand firm behind your beliefs while also remaining calm and consistent.
Learn how to say no to things you don’t want to do and remember that saying “maybe” can often be interpreted as a “yes”.
What are the four stages of manipulation?
While you may not notice any signs that you’re being manipulated at first, there are four stages in which this process consists of:
- Gaining trust – The first phase consists of the manipulative person flattering you with compliments to make you like them.
- Isolation – Once they’ve gained your trust, they start to slowly distance you from your close ones, so you become more vulnerable.
- Gaslighting – They’ll start making you doubt your actions and thoughts so they have more control over you.
- Violence or fear – The last stage of manipulation is gaining complete control over you by using fear and violence as a last measure.
After discovering how to deal with manipulators biblically, remember to always communicate with these people cautiously. They can use many different techniques to make you turn away from your true self, close ones, and God himself.
However, always remember to have faith because the Lord is there to guide you through your hardships. All you need to do is devote your time to prayers, keep calm, and stand strong behind your beliefs.